I spent a couple of days with looking back on my previous years’ works, on what I’ve managed to create, what I haven’t, whether I’ve made any progression or not, and what kind of changes could I notice in my drawing style. The result of this is the following: my drawing performance is chaotic. :’D
It is not only about the fact that sometimes months fly away between two uploads, but also sometimes I create precise, detailed pics and other times I upload poorly drawn squiggles… It feels like that the pics were drawn by different artists. Alright, we can say that during the breaks when I did not draw anything, I was hit by so many stimuli that have changed my fields of interests, aims (sometimes I came closer to more realistic, picturesque, concept-like style, in other times I felt closer to the comic-like, cartoon-like techniques like shading, inking, etc. …). But still, this is not okay for me, I really want to kick myself in the arse to make myself work harder, push harder, and have a linear, clearly visible progress concerning my style and performance. X”D
I really don’t know what to do with myself. Nowadays I try to create something on a daily basis, I try to improve myself, get to know what I do better, how I can improve my performance the most effectively. This is difficult, because I watch a lot of other artists who inspire me and I try to reach their level of proficiency, and most of the time this only makes me sad because I do not feel that we are on the same level and this weakens the spirit… My friends and colleagues say that I am too hard on myself and I am a maximalist, but I cannot change the way I regard myself.
Alright, there are those times (extremely rarely) when I create something great that even I like without any thinking or using references, a pic that I do not want to throw away after a week passes and I take a look on it again. This time I feel like in heaven, but soon the art block comes and I’m in hell again. X”D I just want to please myself and others with my drawings. But often (very often actually) this is extremely hard… the reason for this might be what others say that I try to meet the needs of others, and I’m preoccupied with what they think of me or my drawings. Or that I compare myself to others instead of trying to walk on my own path. But I do believe that I’m not alone with these issues.
Okey, enough with my misery, I do hope that soon I can show you something nice and new :’D
Me, and my dear friend decided to fight against laziness (laziness refers to me, my friend couldn't be more industrious). We started a drawing "battle", which means that we do a lot of challenges, we have to draw every day. If we miss out a day, it's not only a shame for us, but we have to pay for the other person, so we don't want to miss out even one day.
The challenges and the daily drawings can be found on this tumblr page:
or on my own tumblr:
Our first challenge is on expressions, based on an extant challenge, but we decided to draw full-body instead. napalmnacey.deviantart.com/art…
I hope you like these drawings.